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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Not perfect, but good enough

I'm not the perfect mother, but I'm a good mom. My kids are healthy, happy, and well-behaved most of the time because they aren't perfect either. I'm not the perfect wife, but I'm a good wife. I have a happy husband that shares the daily chores and child-rearing responsibilities. I'm an excellent cook, and enjoy cooking on most days. I'm not a perfect housekeeper, but I can be when I need to be. It sounded like a good idea to build a house with an open floor plan, but then when someone comes to the front door, there are only so many rooms in the house I can close off from the mess. I'm not a perfect employee, but I'm darn good at my job and I love the work that I do. Its meaningful to me, I get to exercise my brain, and hopefully have a positive impact on the lives of others. I'm not the perfect friend, but I'm a good friend. I will always answer the phone and make time to share a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, whichever the moment calls for!
I'm a perfectly imperfect working mother, wife, friend, and woman...and I wouldn't have it any other way!
Sometimes I feel inadequate when I talk to my colleagues/friends and hear about their daily routines. They come home, fix dinner, play with the kids, give the kids baths, brush their teeth, read them bedtime stories, say prayers, and put them to bed the same time every night. Then they go back to the kitchen clean up from supper, unload and reload the dishwasher, wipe down the counters, pick up all the toys and food crumbs off the kitchen floor, tidy up the living room, fold a basket of laundry, and then maybe sit down to watch the news before going to bed, but before falling asleep, they climb into their bed that they made in the morning before going to work, and pull out a book and read a couple chapters before saying their own prayers, kissing their husband good night and going to sleep....then they get up at dawn to workout, start a pot of coffee, make everyone's lunches, get the kids clothes ready (if that hadn't been already done the night before), take a shower, gets herself ready, gets the kids dressed, makes all the beds, combs everyone's hair, gives them their breakfasts and Flintstone vitamins, makes sure they all brush their teeth before running out the door to drop them off at childcare or school. Wow, I'm exhausted just typing that. In my mind, that's the type of mother I think I would like to be, but in my reality it doesn't ever happen that way. Is it laziness, procrastination, or in the big big picture of life is it really going to matter? Is it more important that I get all of the Cheerios off of my kitchen floor each night instead of cuddling next to my husband on the couch to watch the current ridiculous reality show on television? Although I value cleanliness, I've decided building healthy relationships and maintaining them are more important than having the perfect house. I would rather read my son's favorite choo choo book for the 235th time then wipe off the counters from dinner. My kids don't get baths every night, but I haven't seen research that says they need them. When I was a kid, we got baths on Saturday night, so we were clean for church on Sunday. Our goal is every other night, but sometimes that doesn't always happen either. We love to read books, and my kids could sit on our laps for hours reading "Goodnight Moon," "Fancy Nancy" and "I Spy" books, and anything by Sandra Boynton; however, we don't always get to reading time every night either. I make an effort to always offer a vegetable at dinner, but sometimes we resort to ketchup as our veggie serving of the night. We aren't perfect parents, but I think we're good enough. Our children have warm beds, a warm house, and parents who love them very much. We praise them and encourage them, we discipline and teach them...we do all that anyone can do by simply doing the best that we can.


  1. Hi! Let me just say, I think as moms we ALL think other moms are doing better than we are, and they just aren''s the "Guilty Mom Syndrome" and I have it too! No one is perfect. My kids never get baths every night, my kitchen floor is a mess, my counters are dirty, and I have a heck of a time cooking meals that taste that great...(hey, at least you can cook!).

  2. Ketchup as the vegetable... that is genius!

    Great new blog. I'll happily follow you here. :)

  3. Hey Wendy...thanks for checking out my blog. I just signed up to follow yours. I still need to re-send your xmas card...I'll get to that and hopefully add an additional handwritten letter.